Children can be irritating in lot of ways. They can be bossy, whining or defiant. But, what does that really mean. Why children adopt such behavioral changes; and what is it that you can do to deal with the issue? Let’s discuss.
As human beings, we have some special social needs such as connecting with the others, combined meal time, independence and self-expression. Adults manage these needs somehow as they can express things and strategize their living style in mature manner. Children, on the other hand, are born powerless. They have no knowledge how to connect with the other people around them and get their social desires fulfilled ideally. So, they almost entirely depend upon their parents even when they are adequately grown up. And while they grow up, they are always in the process of figuring out the ways they can connect with the other people to fulfill their needs. When their requirements are not fulfilled, they can behave in pretty awkward ways which we can simply term as ‘acting out’. What you need to do here is to decipher those expressions by your kids. That will give you the clear sight regarding what you can do to resolve the issue.
One thing worth mentioning here is that when kids act out, it’s their legitimate requirements which they want fulfilled. They only don’t know the right way of conveying that message. So, while you are in the process of figuring out what your child basically needs, you can set limits on his/her behavior by being compassionate. Being compassionate will give you an extended time window to figure out the main issue.
Based on some common experiences by most of the parent, below mentioned are the ways children behave due to some specific reasons.
- The children who do not find a way to cope with what they consider uncertainties start whining.
- Some kids become bossy when they think their needs are not going to be fulfilled.
- Kids who get into a habit of taunting other kids and siblings are usually the ones who feel they are not being valued enough.
- The kids who feel they are not being acknowledged stop listening to their elders.
- Children who feel that they are not connected with their parents start disrespecting their parents.
- Children who have chip on their shoulders are usually the ones overfilled with emotions.
So, what is it that you can do to make things right?
- You need to be compassionate with your kid when he/she starts acting out. You need to acknowledge the perspective of your child. That will help you specifically when you think it’s the time to set certain limits.
- Children need your special time on daily basis. That helps them and you to connect with each other in very effective way. Activities that you can engage in with your kids may be giggling and roughhousing. This special time will allow your children to be emotionally open to you.
- Finally, you need to regulate your own emotions.